Tuesday, November 18, 2008

i'm pretty sure i'll be getting another tattoo sometimes soon. i don't know yet if i want to wait til i go back to milwaukee for thanksgiving or get one here, but it's definitely for sure happening.
i'm watching the TRL finale which is weird and makes me feel old. i used to watch it religiously back in middle school and now it's ending. which is a good thing cuz it sucks major balls nowadays.
i'm getting a sewing machine and i'm gonna start making dresses because i can and because i want to. and i'm serious this time. i'm also gonna reconnect with my artistic side. i'm letting academia take over my life and that is a not good thing.
also looking for apartments still. rey and i really want a place where we can have a doggy, but we'll settle for a cat. and the rent here is rediculously high and it's not even that great of an apartment. what's the point of living on state street if you can't even see state street at least from the window?
i love tuesdays with no class.
i'm hungry and cold
i have homework to finish
i want mcdonalds.
i need to save money for a tat.
i think i'm tired.
i'm going to turn on the heat. and possibly blog again later today.

Monday, November 17, 2008

zazen

ahhhh monday.
rey is the most hilarious person to watch while he's singing. especially when he has headphones on cuz he has no idea how retarded he sounds. it never ceases to entertain me.
well today in Buddhism class, we were to have a panel of Buddhist come to give the lecture. I'm sure I wasn't the only one expecting to see a couple of monks or at least asian or indians. so yeah, i was a little disappointed when i decided against skipping class to see a bunch of old white people talk about how they came to be buddhists. it was possibly more boring than the regular power lecture which trust me, is very hard to top on the boringness scale. some people just have this uncanny ability to make things that are normally interesting seem like the most uninteresting things in the world.
so i just read Persepolis and it was so beautiful and the movie was equally moving. i loved it. and i recommend it to anyone who is reading this, which is most likely no one. but whatevs.
i flew through an essay today, which i'm very happy about. very happy. this semester went pretty well. i'm worried about the semesters to follow...
Thanksgiving soon! i'm excited. i miss the fam. but my mom's leaving the day after i arrive to go to atlanta. but it will still be cool to chill with the sibs.
now rey is rocking out hardcore to seven seas or rye. it is the most intense thing i've experienced all day.
apartment hunting is really a drag. i'm hoping to get a place where i can have a doggy. or at least a kitty. it would make a wonderful addition to our home :)
so we're talking about conception in human sexuality and women's health. and now i'm really paranoid about being infertile. seriously that would suck. but i heard that women who have painful periods generally are those who are ovulating. so i'm hoping the pain is a good sign.
i really really really really really really really really really need some bud. hopefully i can get a nice little care package when i go back to milwaukee cuz this dry spell shit is just not cutting it.
just like i promised to be more consistent in my blogging, i'm also gonna spend some time cultivating my meditation skills. i'm getting better at it the more i practice. and yeah, overall, i think it has made me a slightly happier person. although that might also be due to the change in circumstances. but whatever the reason, i'm grateful.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

sunday bloody sunday

look at me being consistent with my blogging.
sunday morning...that means intense homework doing and america's next top model marathons. i'm trying to avoid getting sucked into the latter. it would be cool to be on that show. i keep saying i'm going to audition...i tell myself i'm avoiding it because i'm afraid of rejection, but really it's because i'm afraid i wouldn't be rejected. and then i'd have to drop out of school and lose my scholarship and i would be away from rey and my family for a long time and just a whole bunch of things that i'm not ready to do. so for now, i'll live vicariously through them while posting comfortably on my couch.
i showered and dolled up today for rey...kinda. i'm sure he's sick of seeing me in a do-rag, no make-up and pajamas. so i guess i'll try to look cute for once. if he doesn't notice then i'm never doing it again.
i'm seriously considering going off birth control. it's causing more problems than it's worth and i can't afford it anyway.
i really want to leave the country for a bit. but i'm too broke for that as well. and i'm getting really tired of people talking about their summers abroad and their vacations in Italy and France. really. i'm glad you're parents are rich enough to do that for you, but it just spells out SPOILED and PRIVELEGE and i don't want to hear it.
i'm actually really tired of pretty much everyone here. i'm surrounded by rich, spoiled brats and fake dumb hippies who honestly don't care about anyone but themselves. they try to act like their activists and are doing something important and saving the world, but really they're just posers. i mean, if you give a fuck about the homeless of the starving people in the third world, you would save the $5 a day you spend at starbucks and send them a check. holding signs and signing petitions isn't doing shit but fulfilling your own sense of gratification. fuck them. for real. fuck them.
but enough ranting. i have to write a paper about kids during wartime.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

wow i suck at blogging.
i'm gonna start doing it more often i guess. why not? no one reads it anyway.
...well i'm at the apartment watching the office. rey is at work. its kinda weird how we live together, yet i still miss him every time he's gone for a long time.
i'm doing quite well academically. which shouldn't come as a surprise considering i spend about 90% of my time studying. i'm feeling really nastolgic...i miss summer and the copious amounts of blunt smoking and concerts and warm weather and chilling...i'm jealous of myself 6 months ago. i was looking at pictures from summer and i was way skinnier too. oh well...summer will come again...not soon enough.
i feel old. i hate getting old. nothing good can come of it.
i can't wait until x-mas. i'm most excited about watching Pee-Wee's Christmas special. i'm hoping it will bring back pleasant childhood memories.
i just spoke with my grandpa and he shares my concern for Obama's safety. There are waaaayy to many rednecks in this country.
well i do believe it's time for me to eat cookies. and pay attention to the office.
future blogs coming soon...